The World is Full of 'Em

How come you rarely see a Porsche with tinted windows? I'll give you my opinion later but for now let me tell you about my ride into town this morning.

I'm sitting at a stop light listening to the radio when I hear this engine revving over and over. I glance to my right and there is this guy staring at me like a sixteen year old boy out on a Friday night in his daddy's car. Only this guy is mid-fifty at least. With a salt and pepper beard. He looked like a college professor. He revs the engine again and grins at me. Now I'm not much of a car guy so while I realize he's driving some kind of silver sports car I didn't pick up on the fact it was a Porsche, until the light turns green and he takes off squealing his tires. He makes it all of about three blocks before we hit another red light.

Again, the same routine only this time I shake my head at his pathetic attempt to relive some bygone dream of his. This time a car turns right off the side street just as the light turns green so I'm out in front while he is stuck behind traffic. Now keep in mind I'm only doing about thirty five or forty miles an hour. Not trying to race this character, I'm just trying to get home so I can get on the computer and do some work.

So this idiot catches me in half a mile or so, pulls up beside me, grins like a shit-eating monkey, and shoots off like rocket, obviously proud to have outran me and my 2008 F-150 with his brand new, sticker-still-on-the-window, sleek, silver Porsche.

That's when it occurs to me. People who buy these kind of cars don't tint the windows because then the whole world wouldn't be able to look at them and whisper … Oooh look at the guy. Of course we ain’t saying what they hope we are saying.